Decision, decision, decision.

老爸說的是實話 他們在金錢在資源方面 從來沒有不支持我
我覺得今天很讓我難過的是
我知道他們在擔心
但是他們光是擔心 擔心著還沒發生的未來 就一昧不看好我
反倒讓我更失望

It's the first time that I actually got the chance and the guts to bring out the idea of wanting to go to Vienna and study German there after I finish my studies here. and their reaction is predictably shocked and somehow don't understand....of course my dad, he wants me to think over this again.

I know the idea of me going there indeed seems ridiculous in a way, but I am confident that Kgo and I can make things work. I don't know why it is so hard for them to accept when I choose to do something that seems to be out of their realm. Of course, I know they're doing so is because they care about me, they want to protect me and want me to make decisions that are good for me. But I really don't see myself going back to Taiwan either. I don't wanna go back. yes, I might eventually get hurt, and go home with wound, hiding my tail between my legs, but before I actually step out and be there. I really know nothing!

I don't know how to explain, but I feel that I'm neither on Kgo's side, nor on their side. It is not that I don't love them, I miss them too, but I know that I won't be happy going back home, because I won't have Kgo on my side, I'll be empty. But going over there is like this daunting gigantic task that I don't know how to solve other than simply trying to carry it out.